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5. You learn about sharing.

You are poised, majestically, like a hawk, or an eagle. You are perched at the shoulder of your friend, your talons ready to take! You reach over your friend and try to grab some [food=select=poutine], but your friend dodges you and moves the plate away from your eager fingers! You sulk majestically!

“Friends share!” you scowl, because you don’t have [poutine] and your friend does have [poutine] and you thought you were getting some [poutine], because you reached rudely onto your friend’s plate and grabbed a bunch of [fries] with the grace of the wind and the precision of a dentist, but your friend then cottoned on to your greediness and became greedy in turn, shielding the food like a bird guarding its nest. You have quite some experience with birds because of your current slogan “I am like an eagle”, and also because you once tried to take some eggs out of a nest and a bird attacked you for it. You tried to reason with it but birds are notoriously irrational.

You have several options here. First, you can attack your friend with your eagle-like talons and, once your friend is no longer in your way, feast on your victory. This is not the best option, and I think you know why. In the violent struggle your friend might drop the [poutine] on the floor, and who wants floor [poutine]?

Your next option is to ask politely, but that’s lame, and not majestic. Majesty involves some form of bird-ishness.

Thus, you caw loudly in your friend’s ear and your friend freaks out. “What the hell are you doing?!” your friend asks. In your friend’s confusion you grab some more [poutine] and run.

You are indeed like an eagle, because this is not rational human behaviour.

About moriwriter

Do you want to know about me? Of course not! You're far more interested in what I know about you. In fact, you're a little concerned with what I know about you... because how do I know that? It's no matter. To understand would require a brief swim in the murky depths of my mind, and you didn't bring your swimsuit and also you don't like getting wet. Never mind me. Let's talk about you.

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